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托福写作中的错误问题解析
1. 指代不清(Ambiguous Reference of Pronouns)
指代不清主要讲的是代词与被指代的人或物关系不清,或者先后所用的代词不一致。试看下面这一句:
Mary was friendly to my sister because she wanted her to be her bridesmaid。(玛丽和我姐姐很要好,因为她要她做她的伴娘。)
读完上面这一句话,读者无法明确地判断两位姑娘中谁将结婚,谁将当伴娘。如果我们把易于引起误解的代词的所指对象加以明确,意思就一目了然了。这个句子可改为:
Mary was friendly to my sister because she wanted my sister to be her bridesmaid。
例1. And we can also know the society by serving it yourself。
剖析:句中人称代词we 和反身代词yourself指代不一致。改为:
We can also know society by serving it ourselves。
2. 不间断句子(Run-on Sentences)
什么叫run-on sentence?请看下面的例句。
例1. There are many ways we get to know the outside world。
剖析:这个句子包含了两层完整的意思:“There are many ways。” 以及“We get to know the outside world。”。简单地把它们连在一起就不妥当了。
改为:There are many ways for us to learn about the outside world. 或:There are many ways through which we can become acquainted with the outside world。
3. 措词毛病(Troubles in Diction)
Diction 是指在特定的句子中如何适当地选用词语的问题,囿于教学时间紧迫,教师平时在这方面花的时间往往极其有限,影响了学生在写作中没有养成良好的推敲,斟酌的习惯。他们往往随心所欲,拿来就用。所以作文中用词不当的错误比比皆是。
例1. The increasing use of chemical obstacles in agriculture also makes pollution。(农业方面化学物质使用的不断增加也造成了污染。)
剖析:显然,考生把obstacles“障碍”,“障碍物”误作substance“物质”了。另外“the increasing use (不断增加的使用)” 应改为“abusive use (滥用)”。
改为:The abusive use of chemical substances in agriculture also causes/leads to pollution。
4. 累赘(Redundancy)
言以简洁为贵。写句子没有一个多余的词;写段落没有一个无必要的句子。能用单词的不用词组;能用词组的不用从句或句子。如:In spite of the fact that he is lazy, I like him。
本句的“the fact that he is lazy”系同谓语从句,我们按照上述“能用词组的不用从句”可以改为:In spite of his laziness, I like him。
例1. For the people who are diligent and kind, money is just the thing to be used to buy the thing they need。
剖析:整个句子可以大大简化。
改为:ligent, caring people use money only to buy what they need。
5. 不连贯(Incoherence)
不连贯是指一个句子前言不对后语,或是结构上不畅通。这也是考生常犯的毛病。
例1. The fresh water, it is the most important things of the earth。
剖析:The fresh water 与逗号后的it 不连贯。It 与things 在数方面不一致。
改为:Fresh water is the most important thing in the world。
6. 综合性语言错误(Comprehensive Misusage)
所谓“综合性语言错误”,是指除了上述十种错误以外,还有诸如时态,语态,标点符号,大小写等方面的错误。
例1.Today, Money to everybody is very importance, our’s eat, cloth, live, go etc.
托福写作高分满分范文点评和思路解析:学生需要上体育课吗?
托福写作难点话题一览
Should we spend all school day studying or set aside some time for exercising?
Some people say that physical exercise should be a required part of every school day. Other people believe that students should spend the whole school day on academic studies. Which opinion do you agree with? Use specific reasons and details to support your answer.
写作思路展开结构分析
同意前者更容易写一些。身体健康对每个人都很重要,并且是学习进步的前提。体育训练可以使学生学到很多东西,比如团队精神。合理的课程设置是学校的责任,学校应该想办法保证学生的健康。
本话题高分范文赏析
Some people believe that it is important to have physical activities as part of a child's everyday curriculum at school. Others disagree, and argue that students should spend all of their time on academic studies. personally, I believe that physical education is a vital part of an education as it teaches children to take care of their bodies, how to work as a team, and gives them a method of releasing tension and aggression. Humans have always known about the importance of taking care of our bodies, but it seems that in recent years, we have gradually forgotten this important fact. It is absolutely necessary to get some physical activity at least a few times a week, and engraining this idea into children when they are young is the best way to ensure their health for life. Physical exercise usually involves teamwork of some sort. Much of the exercise that young people get involves games such as basketball, volleyball, or football. All of these sports teach children how to work together to achieve a common goal, in this case, winning. I also believe that allowing the children to work together in a fun environment, rather than only on academic projects, brings a stronger sense of camaraderie, which helps the children to have healthy relationships with others. Finally, physical exercise is an excellent way to release tension and aggression. If one is particularly stressed about school or life, getting exercise can help the person to relax. As for letting out aggression, it is much healthier to kick a football than it is to hit someone who has made you angry. Exercise should definitely be a part of a student's education. Exercise has much more to offer than simply getting "a break" from academics. Physical exercise can balance out a student's hectic life, and make it much more pleasurable.
托福写作高分满分范文点评和思路解析:设立研究所的目的
托福写作难点话题一
A center for business research or for research in agriculture?
A university plans to develop a new research center in your country. Some people want a center for business research. Other people want a center for research in agriculture (farming). Which of these two kinds of research centers do you recommend for your country? Use specific reasons in your recommendation.
写作思路展开结构分析
本题不存在倾向性,两者择其一展开合理论述即可。如果选择商业研究,陈述中需阐明开展商业研究的必要性;如果选择农业研究,也需要给出充分的理由。另外题目中有提到针对国情的推荐,因此也需要联系我国的实际情况来进行论述,比如根据我国情况,建议偏重农业技术研究,同时加强市场的调控等等。
本话题高分范文赏析
China is currently one of the fastest growing economies in the world. A new research center whether business or agriculturally based, would be beneficial for both our country and the rest of the world. When considering if it would be more valuable to build a business center or an agricultural center, one must realize that both fields of research work hand in hand with each other to develop and expand a country's economy. In a bustling economy like China's, either research center would have great value. There is no doubt that a country's economy is strongly influenced by its ability to not only feed its own people, but also to export agricultural products to other countries. In this sense, an agricultural research center would help further development in China's sustainability and further the country on a global scale. An agricultural research center would also be a great idea in China, as our country already has excellent agricultural techniques. By having this type of research center in China, the world's knowledge on this important field would grow exponentially. Agriculture also has the ability to employ a large percentage of the population, and through agricultural research, these people's efforts could be used in a more efficient manner. A business research center would also be an excellent idea in China. As China becomes more and more prone to the power of globalization, a business research center would allow China to not only keep up with the business-minded West, but also, this type of center could possibly allow our country to surpass the West in new business ideas. China has the largest population in the world, and therefore, the business industry is bound to grow at an alarmingly fast rate. In conclusion, I believe that either of these centers would be beneficial to our country. Perhaps the best solution would be to raise funds for both of the centers, and allow the two centers to work together to build a better China.
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托福写作中的错误问题解析
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